18 June 2008

Onion-theories!

I have a theory. Its like this. The high school wall flower always marries the most popular guy in high school! Even more shocking, that nerd in your class - gap-tooth and thick-as-a-wall glasses - will almost certainly date that pretty blond girl whom you always wanted to ask out but never got the vocal chords to cooperate. ( I hate long sentences!)

I am serious, really. This is not a joke. Go for your high school reunion and you'll understand what I'm talking about.

Look at any successful, handsome (remember, your idea of 'handsome' is not what it used to be in high school), confident businessman/doctor/scientist/professor, with a beautiful, smart wife. One look and you might think that he was what he is, since the day he was born. Ask him, and he will tell you differently.

He would have been too clever for his class, too geeky for his friends (if he had any), too weird in the eyes of his own parents, and described as too weak or sickly in the doctor's file.

One closer look, though, if anyone at all had bothered to indulge, would have shown greatness that could rock a high school kids idea of 'cool'.

He would invariably have possessed the right amount of sense ( a rare thing, indeed), skill, knowledge and street smart-ness to make it as a "successful, handsome. confident man with a beautiful and smart wife".

The wall flower, not to be outshone, would have bloomed into this gelled-hair,-swept back into a severe knot- smart as hell-top of the corporate/organizational ladder-men eating out of her hands-kind of business woman/teacher/stock broker/lawyer/doctor or any professional she chooses.

And she will attract a handsome, moderately smart, totally devoid of streetsmart-ness, ex-most-popular-guy-in-high school-guy who gets pushed around now in the big bad world where 'he ain't no high-school superstar no more' because he needs someone to tell him "he can do it". He will approach her because he mistakenly thinks that she was this beautiful and successful all her life. She will accept him, because she can't believe a handsome guy actually wants to be with her.

Sometimes, just sometimes, a geek-turned-successful professional and a wallflower-turned-successful professional will cross paths, eventually arrive at love (they never fall in love, they never 'fall'), and decide - with minds analyzing the pros and cons of such a decision, and trying to comprehend the unfamiliar emotions welling up - to stay together for a very long time. Such relationships have the potential for greatness, real greatness, maybe like the Curies.

Disclaimer: This is only a theory that has been partially researched using limited knowledge. the sample universe is a motley group of individuals that do not represent the human race in its entirety. The data is skewed and the results are highly debatable. Consequentially, the derivations are fallible and may be deconstructed to nothing, just like onions. People who were popular in high school are not to assume that it is directed at them. The not-so-popular others also need not take offense, although anyone fitting the favorable descriptions in the above post are encouraged to gloat, brag, and generally burst at the seams with pride while secretly laughing at those unfavorably portrayed. (Today is 'be mean day').

Sigh...today has been a day of long sentences.... I have a theory... long sentences usually stem out of suppressed feelings resulting from traumatic events experienced at high school... hmm, must research that.

03 June 2008

Pride and Prejudice!

My computer crashed! How timely is that?! I mean, I have to submit my MPhil. thesis at the end of June, and here's my computer showing attitude! AAaaarrrgh! I took four days off, and got my husband to help out with Debbie and the chores while I worked on my thesis. He even did some of the typing work for me. And then, Sunday morning I open a blank file where Chapter 3 used to be.....!

I mean, I saved the file and everything. I think it's about time we got rid of that computer (It's as old as the hills!) My husband just won't do it...I don't know if it has emotional value for him (he just tried to throw out Debbie's favourite book last weekend because it was dogeared! I just don't know what makes these men tick...). Maybe, he has some distant hope in the computer's human-like will power to make one last Herculean effort. I tell you, the whole deal is as nonsensical as that last sentence. Anyway, that's my husband and his computer!

So yesterday we just gave the entire chapter to be typed at a DTP centre, where they will type your stuff out and save it for a minimal amount of money. That works for me, I tell you.

I don't have to deal with the typing work along with all the other stuff that's driving me crazy around here.

Debbie is beginning to stand without support for a few seconds nowadays. Her best yet is 10 seconds! She is really excited about it...but unfortunately has inherited the family trait of letting the excitement get out of control!

She now walks around the entire house (with support) and pulls down anything, and I mean anything she can reach. She pulled down on herself the entire pile of xeroxed secondary source material I had collected for my thesis! She managed to eat a few words too!

One day, I found her dutifully chewing her way through the headphones! That cost a lot of money and she was brunching on it!

Then there's the books, face cream tubes, underwear (my husband left the drawers open again!), stationary, TV remote, clothes (right off the hangers) etc., etc...

She is getting her fourth teeth and it's driving her crazy..She has recently developed a craving for my fingers. I would be sitting there, absorbed in my work, and she would sneak up to me, grab one of my fingers and dig her teeth right in! Gosh, I should probably introduce her to hotdogs, or maybe they have already been introduced and she just misses them!

When she cannot get at my fingers, she goes for my hair! Yep! That's what I said, my hair! She likes to pull really hard at one strand at a time and put me through excruciating pain while she claps her hands in absolute delight! Oh yeah, just for the record, she has learnt to clap her hands to music or when she is happy!

See what I mean? Here I was, narrating my unfortunate accidents and the torture I suffer at the hands of my 10 month old daughter. Yet, I can't resist bragging about her achievements. I guess that's what parents are like. So proud of their children. Makes me think of my own parents and the sacrifices they made for me. Every time I excelled in school or at art or music, they would be so full of pride and would talk about it to relatives and neighbours for so many days! Failure on my part, at the same time, would send them to the depths of disappointment that was worse than the sadness I felt at my failure. Parents practically live for us, and love us with a love so pure that it is only lesser than God's love for us.

I have wonderful parents, let me tell you. At the most unexpected of moments this fact hits me and I feel a rush of gratitude and my eyes fill up with tears. I regret to say that I rarely express this gratitude properly to my parents.

I guess that's why we have Father's Day and Mother's Day, a day on the calendar when the whole world is telling you "this is your day to go and tell you mom or dad that you love them, that they are special and that you are happy and successful and they had a large part to play in forming this success and happiness". Just tell them that you love them.

Happy Father's Day in Advance to all the fathers in the world!

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